Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Weighty Issue

As I pushed the double stroller, walked with a baby strapped to my chest and repeatedly lifted Grace and Evan to see animals yesterday at the zoo nothing was more painful than seeing myself in the pictures from yesterday. I 'will' defend myself that the black sweater I was wearing added 10 pounds to me and I have since thrown it in the trash, however...I am still BIG. I spent all of last night depressed and feel even worse this morning. Yes, even with 4 little ones to chase, lift and play with - I can't seem to lose this weight. Matt and I just got our tax return and I think we might take a portion of it and buy an elliptical machine. We need it. We need to be healthier. I need to feel better about myself. I cannot be a cow in a bathing suit at the beach. There is no food that can taste as good as skinny would feel to me.
My goal is to lose 15 pounds by July 11th. It's about a pound a week. Realistic, right? Wish me luck! July 11th is when Matt's cousin Mike gets married. I want to look good in a dress since this most likely will be the first time Matt and I will get out on a date without the kids since the twins were born --- And yes, the twins will be 8 months old at that point.

4 comments:

Lindsay Pierson said...

I just went to look at your zoo pictures expecting to see a large woman, and that is NOT what I saw! You are hardly a cow, you look great! Having said that, I know how you feel. My twins are ten months old and the last ten pounds I need to lose just aren't coming off and I feel GROOOOOSSSS!! Even if I am not morbidly obese, it is hard to see what I see when i look in the mirror naked!! Good luck! :)

chillingurl said...

OMG Lindsay! your not "BIG", you wanna talk about "BIG", look at my fat ass. Believe me, you look GREAT! You really really do. Wait till I have kids, I will grow like 100 + pounds..then we can talk about being "BIG"..haha.

Heidi said...

I have to agree with the others that you do not look like a cow, but I understand what you are saying. I miss my flat stomach. Don't be too hard on yourself, it takes time.

Lisa said...

You can do it, Lindsay. A pund a week is totally do-able. I have to agree with other posters on this, though..... you are not HUGE. I do know, however, that we each see ourselves differently than the world sees us. I think that you are beautiful and AMAZING for surviving with 4 under 3!!!