Tuesday

The kids are so out of whack lately. They know that I am not myself. I can't pick them up, snuggle like usual, cook for them...and they don't like it. I feel awful about it. The have not been in their routine and that makes things even worse. Now hopefully we will be back into the routine and things will settle down. Debbi and Rob will be here starting Friday night so that will be 'different' but at least the kids will still do what they usually do and be in their own house and beds. Rob will leave Monday and Debbi will be here until Matt is done nights on next Friday morning. Then Matt has off for two whole weeks! We are trying to get things set up for all the changes that are coming in the next few weeks but we never seem to make any headway. Our whole life is just a little out of control and I hate it since I'm a control freak. I have my calendar and my lists and just like to be organized. I am waiting for some good news this week at the doctor, but am trying to prepare myself for bad news.

On a totally different topic...friends. Through this whole ordeal of me on bed rest and the possibility of having these girls too early we pretty much have found out who our friends are. When I was admitted to the hospital the first time, we were scared. Scared out of our minds to be honest. Things weren't looking promising. I made a phone call that weekend from the hospital to a 'friend' just to talk. Looking for a distraction. No response. Still haven't heard from her. I pretty much wrote that friend off. I know that may sound harsh but if you can't count on someone to be there for you when you really need to talk to someone...what good are they? It's been a pretty one sided friendship anyway with me doing the contacting, phone calls, texts and emails for a while now. So I guess it's really not much of a loss anyway. On the other side of things, we got phone calls to check in when I was in the hospital and emails to see how things were going from one of our other friends, and even offers to come over and help even when they are super busy with working, 2 kids, and a busy life of their own. Those are things you don't forget. We so have to get together with them. I will feel a little bad about just sitting on the couch with my feet up while we have guests here but I know they will understand. We actually had plans to see them the day I went into the hospital the first time.

Evan is talking so much now. You can understand him most of the time if you're paying attention. Grace still talks for him a lot and he knows it so I think that might be holding him back a little bit. He is getting quite the little attitude lately. I guess he's getting to that age where he knows now that he has a choice and can make decisions on his own, or at least he thinks that he can! I still can't complain, I have two great kids.

My Mom and Dad took the kids to a pumpkin patch on Sunday and met Megan & Ellie there. I wish I could have gone too. They sound like they had a blast. I also wish I could have gone because I pretty much never see Megan or Ellie. Maybe once every couple months. It's pretty sad. She's so busy all the time though so it's hard. And now with Seth in school full time that makes things more complicated.

I need a new computer...really bad. This one is broken in so many ways...the latest is the power cord doesn't work all the time.

Sorry this was so random. But my mind is just all over the place lately.