Saturday, May 24, 2008

Just have to

I know that I shouldn't even approach this subject but I just can't help it...I know that someone might feel as though this is talking about them but in all honesty, the person who really inspired this blog i'm not sure even knows how to use a computer.

I just have to talk about relationships. It seems like all of the relationships around me are falling apart at a rapid pace. Is it our age or is it just how things are now? Are Matt and I really that strange? We have a wonderful marriage. I really love him. I love him more than I did the day we got married. I miss him when he's not here. I look up to him when I see how amazing he is with the kids. He takes care of me when i'm sick. I would go to the ends of the earth for him, do anything for him. We have our arguements. And they usually last a whole 5 minutes. What is so important that you can't talk it out with someone you pledged to love for better or worse? How do you just simply 'fall out of love' with someone? The simple answer is you don't IF you truely loved them in the first place. I'm not talking loved like a friend, i'm talking the all encompassing, whole body, love until it hurts, unconditional love. I cannot imagine happily living my life without Matt in it. He's in every thought and future daydream that I have. Sitting at the kids sporting events together, teaching the kids how to drive, putting the kids on the bus for their first day of kindergarten, walking Grace down the aisle when she gets married(at age 40). Is it luck that we found each other again after not talking very much to each other for those few years after high school? Maybe. But I also think that it has something to do with the fact that we both got to live independent lives for a little while before we got together. Matt did his, what i call, "alcoholic" phase and went to the bars all the time and bought way too many "toys", and hung out with the guys all the time. I did the college thing and the drinking thing and living in AZ thing. We knew what it was like to be independent and do our own thing. I guess I may have lost my point in this....I just don't understand how you can walk away from someone that you pledged your love to with, what seems like, not even a second thought.

No comments: